Monday, May 26, 2008

Green Sun Ululation

[Read Write Poem's challenge this week was to write about something that doesn't exist. I let my imagination go, and here's what I got. Check out what other folks imagined here.]



Green Sun Ululation

I walk under the green sun at noon
and I know that my skin will burn purple
because I forgot sunscreen
this morning.

After our yellow sun turned green your song
is all new. How do you make that noise?
I hear hints of the forests of my childhood, but
not like a bird.

To hear it brings peace to my heart
and I sit entranced until you are finished.
And then I sit some more, hoping to hear
you sing again.

With an empty yearning, I turn to go,
aching for your intoxicating sound.
Without it I notice my burning skin,
and I itch.

This morning
not like a bird
you sing again
and I itch.



14 comments:

polkadotwitch said...

i'm glad you created something (form) that you may use again! that's one sign the exercise worked. yay!

sister AE said...

Thanks, Carolee. It was a fun challenge.

Linda Jacobs said...

Wicked cool form! I like the way each last line is repeated as the last stanza!

sister AE said...

Thanks, Linda. It gave me some focus while my ideas ran a bit wild. Give it a whirl.

Nathan1313 said...

This poem has a haunting strangeness that I really like. And the form you've invented is great. Mind if I use it sometime?

anthonynorth said...

This worked well - and strangely atmospheric.

mariacristina said...

The content is almost abstract, yet the repetition of certain phrases and line lengths grounds the poem. Many vivid images.

sister AE said...

Thanks, Nathan1313. I haven't done any research to see if the form is related to something else, so I haven't named it. But go ahead and have fun anyway! Let me know what you come up with.

Hello, anthony. Thanks.

Hi, Christine. This does edge toward the surreal a bit, but I was a bit shy of being buried by too many details.

Writer Reading said...

I like the way your sun turning green changes a sound and I like the form you've created.

sister AE said...

Thanks, WR.

one more believer said...

most enjoyable read...

sister AE said...

Hello, OMB. I'm glad you like it.

Jade said...

a fairy tale - adore this

sister AE said...

Thanks, Jade.